We had a bad day.
As the days grew closer and my backlog of posts grew smaller and smaller I knew I would have to make a decision. The decision as to whether or not to post about the bad day.
In the grand scheme of things, it was an isolated event. A few hours out of a Saturday that did not have a lasting impact…was it something to discuss on the internet? Would I be glossing over the truth if I skipped this entry…or would I opening up a can of worms by writing it?
In the end, I don’t know that there is a right answer. But if you’ve been married for any length of time, you have probably had a day like the one I am about to describe. (Except for maybe the specific terms of house construction).
On a chilly Saturday morning, I got out to the house a little later than planned. The night before I stayed there late (alone) while Tyler played a gig to help make a little money to pay for this whole project. I had been tasked with painting the facia, soffits and other boards that will line the roof. I was also asked to use caulk to put on this mesh wire so that little bugs wouldn’t get into the house through the venting.
With a very small time window, as Tyler was heading to perform at a wedding in the afternoon and had a street dance that evening, my tardiness did not help matters. We needed to get some of these painted pieces up on the roof, and the rain was on its way.
The plan? Pick up the 16 foot piece of soffit (which is more awkward than heavy due to its size) and hold it up above our heads on the roof so it can be nailed into place…while standing on ladders….with just two people.
We moved the board onto the roof by first setting it on top of the garage. Then, we walked to the ladders with the board and climbed up. On first raise, there was too much of a bend in the board due to its length. On the second raise, I used my head to help balance the board, as my arms were starting to give. Tyler began nailing his side into place when the mistake happened.
I didn’t have the side of the board flush. The soffit wasn’t lined up properly. The nails had to be removed. I started to get teary.
As the nails were removed, it caused the board to tear and holes filled the spots were the nails were. The board was unusable. I had just wasted the cost of the board, the time and money spent painting it and the time it took to try to set it and nail it into place.
Tyler was struggling with his frustration. Some choice words (not toward me, but towards the situation) came out. I felt as low as a person possibly could. I just ruined a 16 foot board in less than three minutes. I started crying.
And not the pretty, sad, Hollywood, salty-tears-running-lightly-down-your-face type of crying. The chin dimpling, nose running, red-faced all out sobbing that shakes your whole body.
“Stop crying.” He said.
I tried. But my chest continued to jerk convulsively while I tried to hold back the tears. I was still holding the board while my meltdown was happening.
“Just drop it.” He said.
I carefully put one foot down each step of the ladder at a time, and let the broken board drop. Then I walked as quickly as possible out of the house and to the mulberry tree. It had begun raining and I just cried and cried and cried by the grove of trees.
After about twenty minutes, I walked back towards the house. We grabbed another of the three soffit boards and came up with a better way to put it up and hold it to make sure it aligned with the side of the roof.
Throughout the day, I received numerous texts, phone calls and in person moments where Tyler apologized for making me cry. Though, I don’t feel he made me blubber. I felt that I was not smart enough, strong enough or resourceful enough to be helpful with that day. I felt that I wasted my husband’s hard earned money and limited time.
It was a bad day.
The good thing about bad days? They are far less than the good days. Fortunately, this day was the only day (out of three months) that ended in tears for me. And yet, we still managed to pull it together and complete the job (despite the obstacle and ruined board).
Here’s to more good days.